1 post tagged “apology”

What is the role of remorse in forgiveness? Is it necessary to be genuinely sorry in order to be forgiven? Is forgiveness a balm we offer in order to soothe and heal the remorse of another person?

When we forgive in the absence of remorse, who is served? Perhaps, in such a case, the balm is for our own injured feelings and our pride. If we are wronged and the person truly does not feel sorrow or distress over what they've done, we are faced with a choice: carry a grudge that may color or end our interactions with the individual (appropriate response in some situations), or 'be the bigger person' by forgiving despite the lack of remorse or apology so that we can coexist in harmony and save the the relationship. Maybe if we believe we've taken the high road by offering forgiveness, we're better able to absorb the blow to our pride. Personally, I sometimes find it harder to forgive the callousness and lack of feeling than the original offense in these situations.